second place

It's been 7 years and my husband still finds solice in movies where the wife who cheated on and divorced her husband eventually takes him back. 

I still feel like I'm the the chump prize. The after thought. If he really loves me more that he ever loved her, then why isn't he grateful life didn't work out as he originally planned? Why would he be willing to settle for "content" over happy? I don't get it. Why am I not even ought to make up for her leaving and running the plan he had for 1 marriage?